Living Life

Life is about living it. Live life to love it. Fall in love with life. It takes time to love life but once you learn what you want out of life, it's time to live. Make sure every move that you make in life is about change.

Some say that they never change but sometimes, you HAVE to change. Change is good if it's for the positive. Positive changes show growth and soon you'll be living your life to the fullest.

Regrets? That is not always a bad thing. We all wish that we could have done something different. But that's when make that change in life to live how YOU want to live. Realize that it's okay to regret some things, just change and live life and put the regrets behind you.

Change from experiences that you learned from and fall in love with yourself. Remember your past while moving onto your next day. Don't forget your past, embrace it and live for the future of change. Life is about progression, so fall in love with life and live life to the absolute fullest.

Respect

Respect. One key factor to self-confidence is demanding respect. If you allow someone to dis-respect you, this is a sign of weakness. I've learned that through my past marriage. You will respect me for the work and time that I give you. I always make one last attempt before I totally cut somebody off. I've learned to respect until I start feeling disrespected. I also give people the benefit of the doubt. I reach out because I can. As soon as I feel like I'm being taken advantage of, I give that last attempt. If that last attempt still steers me wrong, I cut that person out of my life (without them ever knowing). That's not being fake in any way, this is moving on with life. If I ever see that person, I'm still able to show love. Some say I'm too nice. I'm just a silent but observant person that makes decisions on people based on what they present themselves as while keeping a smile on my face. No, I'm not smiling in your face and talking about you behind your back, I'm just politely giving you a smile. There's no time in my life to talk about you because you already gave me an answer about you. No more mind questioning is needed out my energy. I'm a good judge of character. I demand respect in a very polite way.

A Coach's Role

A coach. A coach is someone who teaches a player how to become. They teach that player what they need to know to be the best that they can be in whatever sport or activity. I've learned, as a coach, that there is more to it than coaching the sport or activity. When you stand in front of that group that you're coaching, those players see a role model. While you are standing there in front of them, they are reading you. They know if you are passionate about what you have to coach. They know if you care. They can read why you decided to teach them. They want to know. As the coach teaches them day by day, the players gain an amount of respect. They will either respect this coach or disrespect the coach. A coach that cares will notice if the players begin to respect them . A coach that cares will demand the respect and give it as well. A coach that cares will listen to the players and learn what he/she needs to develop those players. A coach will learn everyday and will feel good about what they taught. A coach will know that their players will feel good about themselves when they leave practice and they will be confident when it's game time. This is the best part about being a coach; knowing that they are learning from what you are teaching.

My Son's Window

Looking through my son's window
The shield of glare
As the light
Radiates off the glass
Blocking the view
Of what God has placed
In front of him
"Look at mommy"
I yell at him
Not knowing that
He Can't
His frustration causes
Negative actions
I continue to
Ignore signs
Of the glare in his window
Until one day I notice
His squint
On a cloudy day
I take him in to get checked out
"Legally blind,
possibly 100% blind any day,
check up every 3 months,
we gotta keep a close eye on him"
I imagine what he sees and
I place myself in his shoes.
I can't believe
That this is what he sees,
Or doesn't.
Looking out my son's window
I become angry, frustrated
Irritated so I begin to
Eliminate
Myself from society.
The urge to stay home
Because outside of this front door
Everything moves too fast.
I don't want to play sports
Because my head begins to pound.
Don't ask me to play,
I really don't want to.
Looking through my son's window
I notice the curtains beginning to close
I pull the string to open the curtains wider
But every string I pull
It closes the curtains.
Looking through my son's window
I realize the strength that
My son possesses,
An everyday fight to pull that string
Hoping that this dark light
That's shielding him from clear site
Of the world
Brings light of sight
I can say that
Looking through my son's window
I realize how I don't posses the strength
That he has, which builds
My admiration
For such a strong young boy
That his mother is raising.

Pouring Heart

My heart pours.

My heart pours to the child with lost eyes.

My heart pours to the woman with weak cries.

My heart pours to the mother with a lost child.

My heart pours to the father who works hard to try.

My heart pours,

So I send my love to the world that wants a smile.

A Perfect World

I am able to live a free life. Too many people are enslaved by society. 'I wonder what THEY are gonna think of me if I do this or do that.' Who gives a damn what you do with your life! I just hope that one day everyone will worry about themselves and accept others for who they grow to become. Everyday we learn more about ourselves and learn to accept ourselves. If everyone understood that we are who we are, than the world would be such an acceptable place to live. But then again, that would be considered a perfect world. Heaven, maybe.

Child's Hard Work

Kids are amazing. Earlier today my son was working on his homework and he was very frustrated. He is learning subtraction and didn't know how to do it because he didn't have a number chart. I told him to grab a scratch piece of paper and just draw circles and cross out however many he needed to. So he got a piece of paper and started working on his homework. He was so focused. Now it's a few hours later and my boys are sleep in their room. I notice that his homework is on the table and as I look at it, I can't help to feel prod of him. I look over his work and it is 100% correct and he has his little scratch paper to show his hard work. Such a precious moment.

Split-Person-Ality

Sometimes I smile
Sometimes I frown
Sometimes I stay silent and let you walk away
Sometimes I cuss you out before you stray
Sometimes I take shots back and dance
Sometimes I smoke weed and relax
Sometimes I sit back and think about pain in the world
Sometimes I sit back and say fuck the world
Sometimes I pray at night and pour my heart out
Sometimes I wonder if it's worth even praying about
Sometimes I am ready to spread love and uplift
Sometimes I get frustrated at people's bullshit
Sometimes I wonder why my mind is so busy
Sometimes I accept that it's just my split-personality

Stir Crazy

The only way to rest is to relieve my chest from all the emotions that the day brings. I am a very thoughtful person. I think about everyone and everything throughout my day. I think about the lady that walked pass me and smiled. I think about the little kids that ran in front of my car while drinving. I think about housework. I think about everything and too much that my emotions run wild everyday. I think too much.

Haunted Past

Our past will always be apart of self. We do not have to dwell on the past but instead, we should grow from it. We need to use our past mistakes, regrets, failures and even painful experiences as learning experiences for growth. We as independent individuals have the tendency to block the past. Blocking the past is not a reliever, instead a burden. Whenever we are reminded about that piece of past, a piece of burden grows around the heart. This burden reminds me of iron. We ignore the fact that our heart has the ability to heal if we open it up to hurt but when we bandage that hurt to keep the pain in, we block it. We stop the hurt from pouring out. So iron grows around our heart until we can no longer feel pain. Our heart is now made of iron. So this iron becomes cold and heartless. We are now so cold that we become numb to the world from this iron heart.

Relief

The feeling of accomplishment is one of the most relieving feelings in the world. The way your heart warms up in your chest and the rest of your body is able to completely relax is easing to the soul. Accomplishing a major, or even minor task is a healthy, natural boost of energy to attack more goals.

WonderLand

I often drive in a silent car, listening to my thoughts. I reflect on life and how it has led me to where I am now. I think about the people who I've interacted with, situations that could have been different, and how people may view me. My mind wonders in so many ways that I have to control feelings of hurt, pain, frustration, joy, love, strength, humility, and the simple but most complex question of, 'who am I?' I've taken this time to get to know myself everyday so now I question if the people around me are going to be able to accept who I am. I wonder while viewing the world outside of my windshield and my mind is taking me on an endless road to wonderland. I wonder what may happen next.