Breast Cancer Awarness

I felt the pain
But convinced my mind
To exchange ignorance
With strength.
I can take this pain
I'm a grown woman
What's a little pain,
Every now and again?
Here and there
A couple of times a week
I questioned the pain once
But didn't give thought to
The answer that I seek.
I looked in the mirror
Topless, viewing my breast
They look fine
They're probably just FINALLY growing
Is my guess
My period comes the next day
Oh, that's all that it was
I knew I would get the answer
If I pray.
But the question was still
Unanswered
Just ignorant conclusions of denial
Deep in my mind
I ignore the voice
Telling me to
Seek the truth...
There is more to this pain
So I look in the mirror
Topless, once again
I tried the test
That the doctor told me
The test they always talked about
On the television screen
That Test!
I did the test and felt no difference
So I ignored
Once again
The obvious circumstances
Of my body saying
Make that call
Just to be sure.
But,
I continued to work
Day after day
Admiring how my breast
Look
When I noticed that perfect swell
The new bra
The shirts I now fill
It's the new me!
I have this new walk
Confidence
Admiring my physical
People's compliments.
No, not verbally
Just their eyes piercing at my
Twins.
I feel a new since of womanhood
That has grown inside of me
I HAVE BREAST NOW!
I'M A TOTAL COMPLETE PACKAGE
now....
It was until
That pain struck
Took my breath away
Unable to stand up straight
Fell to my knees
This striking pain
Lasting a lifetime
(or that's how it seems)
Unable to speak
The strength has faded
The ignorance took it's stab
Knocked me to my knees
Feeling weak.
Unable to breathe
I lay there
breathless....

Awaken to lights
I hear a voice talking
Unable to put together this man's voice
Until I glance up at his white gown
It's a doctor talking
What's happening?
I question
But unable talk
Due to this tube in my throat
The doctor glances down
To see my dazed eyes open
He looks over
My eyes follow his
To view my mother
Sitting in the chair
Red eyed
She stands
Grabs my hand
Kisses my forehead
I feel a tear
Slide from my eye
Down to my ear
As I see on the bored behind her
Breast Cancer patient.



I want to clear up the fact that I have not been through this painful experience but I know people who have. This is not a real life situation but it's my way to express the importance of this disease. We need to be aware! This is my dedication to breast cancer awareness.

Heavy Hearted

Today I woke up with my heart caved into my chest. It's amazing what a night's sleep can give you. It can either give you a fresh start when the sun shines through your curtains or it could be a pain in your heart when you hear the rain pouring against your window pane. Window pane. This morning I felt the pain when I looked out the window from a past that haunts my emotional state of mind. I have the tendency to give my whole heart to people that are undeserving. Friends and family. People I don't know. People that I want to know. This is the way that God has made me and sometimes I wonder if I could have a little cold in my heart. I wonder what it feels like to have that ice cold heart that burns a person's hand whenever they touch it. Black Ice. I wonder what is going on in their mind but I can honestly say that God redirects those feelings when I begin to start getting myself together to start the day. That feeling is a forever lasting feeling that comes to light from time to time. Thank God for Him, my sister and my poetry this morning.

Strong Base

I have realized in life that in order to be successful, we have to make sure that our base is strong. Making that strong base takes time. Years. We learn that having a lot of money is the key to happiness but what most of us don't realize is that we have to make ourselves before the money makes us. Being successful is a learning experience. Our attitudes are tested, money comes and goes, people come into our lives and we have to figure out what to do with those people. We are constantly being tested on how to handle ourselves. I believe it's a test to see if we have the patience to be successful. We can have the look and make a lot of money without taking the time to know ourselves or we can take the time to know ourselves then plan on making a lot of money. Take control and don't ever be controlled. This test trial in life is a make or break situation. I plan on setting my foundation to be a successful woman in this world. In order to do that, I am accepting the fact that I have a lot to learn and I am being patient while working my hardest to be successful. Success will come and with success comes money. Money will come but success will not always come with money. I am working on my base.

Out of Context

Sometimes I feel that I may say things that offend people. It's not about what was said, it's about how it was taken. I don't understand why someone can take it out of context until I put myself in their shoes. I think about what was said, how they may be feeling with life and their personal views. Let me make this clear, I will not apologize for what was said but I will say that I will make sure the person feels that I did not mean to offend them.

Today, I told a friend of mine to come over and hang out tonight. I told her to come hang out but we will not talk on anything negative or any bullshit. She took it wrong. What I meant was, I feel so happy and positive with life and nothing is going to break me down. I'm going to use this positive energy that I'm feeling to hopefully lift my friend so the negativeness can be left at the door.

I will not apologize for somebody's assumptions, but I will explain myself to clear up any misunderstandings.

Life's Advantage

Take advantage of life, don't let life take advantage of you. While you're sitting there crying and drowning in your tears from what happened to you, time is passing. Time is passing everytime you say that you cant do something. Time is passing everytime you sit on the couch talking about your're bored. Time is always busy, are you? While you are sitting there talking about how you don't have the time to do something, time is doing something to you. Take advantage of life, don't let life take advantage of you.

No Limit

When you set limits, you take away from yourself. Let me elaborate. I said that I was a poet which grew to writing a book which grew to the urge of wanting to write music and so on. I took in writing as my passion and realized that there are so many things that I can do with this art that God has blessed me with. I did not limit myself to JUST A POET. I ran with it and I'm growing more and more everyday. So my point is to embrace a joy and expand it to a passion.

Taking a Chance

‎"Don't rain on my parade...Life's too short to waste one day...I'm gonna risk it all....freedom to fall.....sure looks good to me...." -Vocals: A. Keys

Would you take the chance to jump off the highest skyscraper to fall into freedom? Is it worth the joy in the end?

Genuine Love

To love and feel comfortable with myself and my life decisions. It is the greatest joy. I am proud to say that I can walk with my back straight and chin up. I am walking in confidence so I am sure that if somebody does something wrong to me, I am able to not recover, but not even be bothered by their negative actions. Whatever makes you smile, make sure you do it. If steering people the wrong way makes you happy, well that's a decision that you have to make and I hope it works for you. A person with self love and confidence will let it roll off their back and be able to keep moving forward. So I have just some simple advice, get to know yourself. Not artificial but genuinely.

Night to Remember

So I am super excited about today. I have been naturally high off life but today is a whole other attitude. Tonight is the night that I am reading at a spoken word. I am in a tug-o-war with my poems. I am still unsure of what I'm going to read tonight and so I have stored a few poems in my memory bank. Now it's just a decision on which one to say. Other than that road block, I AM SO EXCITED!

Tonight is going to be a night to remember because the greatest poets in Seattle are apart of this showcase. Not only am I looking forward to hearing these artist's amazing words, it's my brother and sister-in-law's 10 year aniversary. Some of my closests freinds are going to be there supporting the art that I absolutely love and a few of my cousins. We are going to have a wonderful, beautiful night that is going to be in the history books.